Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Help Yourself

If one has grown up as an adult, looking back all the time for all small issues of life, for help from outside, then one has just grown old as an adult and not at all rich in experience and maturity to solve the issues of life with self- help. So much of help lies inside us- which goes totally unnoticed. Each individual has the potential and capacity to solve all the challenges which life throws at them, but every time we have to look inwards for help, there is a deep embedded knowledge, power and strength already there. But as a child we should be exposed to our this faculty, otherwise it remains dormant, but still if one takes a decision to use it at any age one has to just go ahead. Mind is like a library, full of wisdom on all layers.

We are so full of self noise inside and outside, that this wisdom gets buried beneath all this noise. If we consciously decide to stay quiet, silent, talk less, talk softly, slowly and sweetly; when we talk loud we get disconnected with the natural rhythm of this universe. Beyond this noise lot of wisdom awaits, which shall flow from our own soul, in the form of self help required for any present situation.

Soul manifests through body, it carries lot of knowledge, if we are able to quiet our own mind, creating stillness and silence inside, then we can clearly hear to the soul. Soul can help us experience blissfulness amidst any kind of confusion. But first we have to create bliss inside; we shall then attract or draw bliss from all worldly pleasures. A miserable person will attract misery from every where.

There is short inspiring story of 4- Wives, which I had read as a child in a book, I would like to share it here:

There was a rich merchant who had 4 wives. He loved the 4th wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and treated her to delicacies. He took great care of her and gave her nothing but the best. He also loved the 3rd wife very much. He was very proud of her and always wanted to show off her to his friends. However, the merchant was always in great fear that she might run away with some other men. He too, loved his 2nd wife. She was a very considerate person, always patient and in fact, merchant's confidante. When ever merchant faced any problem, he always turned to his 2nd wife and she would always help him out and tide him through difficult times. Merchant's 1st wife was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and business as well as taking care of the household. However, the merchant did not love the first wife and although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her.

One day, the merchant fell ill. Before long, he knew that he was going to die soon. He thought of his luxurious life and told himself, "Now I have 4 wives with me. But when I die, I'll be alone. How lonely I'll be!" Thus, he asked the 4th wife, "I loved you most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No way!" replied the 4th wife and she walked away without another word. The answer cut like a sharp knife right into the merchant's heart. The sad merchant then asked the 3rd wife, "I have loved you so much for all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No!" replied the 3rd wife. "Life is so good over here! I'm going to remarry when you die!" The merchant's heart sank and turned cold.

He then asked the 2nd wife, "I always turned to you for help and you've always helped me out. Now I need your help again. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!" replied the 2nd wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave." The answer came like a bolt of thunder and the merchant was devastated. Then a voice called out: "I'll leave with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go." The merchant looked up and there was his first wife. She was so skinny, almost like she suffered from malnutrition. Greatly grieved, the merchant said, "I should have taken much better care of you while I could have!"

Actually, we all have 4 wives in our lives:
a. The 4th wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die.
b. Our 3rd wife? - Our possessions, status and wealth. When we die, they all go to others.
c. The 2nd wife is our family and friends. No matter how close they had been there for us when we're alive, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.
d. The 1st wife is in fact our soul, often neglected in our pursuit of material, wealth and sensual pleasure.
Guess what? It is actually the only thing that follows us wherever we go. Perhaps it's a good idea to cultivate and strengthen it now rather than to wait until we're on our deathbed to lament. Let us help our self right now cultivating a soulful life.

Soul has three faculties which it has to use- mind, intellect and values/ belief system. But with most of us these three faculties get so dominating, that instead of soul running and managing them, they are on their own and soul sits in when corner neglected under the clutter of our mind. If the soul is in a blissful condition, pure, peaceful and calm, it shall get the right guidance from God. We should know our role. We are like a student and God is like a teacher/ guide/ power. He can teach us, guide us, give us strength but we have to perform in the exam our self, we can prepare with His help for the exam but we have to appear in the exam our self. So learn to take help from Him and prepare your soul, but appear in exams with your own help.

If the soul is in the right condition, it shall use the mind, intellect and belief system righteously to generate the right thought, from right thought comes the right feeling, from right feeling comes the right attitude, from right attitude comes the right words/ actions, they form our habit, then personality and it constitutes our Destiny. So we can create our right Destiny from just one right thought. Help yourself to generate this right thought.

Transformation is just one thought away, not years of work. It is really worth it. By just changing ourselves, we can actually make a big difference to make the world a better place.


  1. The story of four wives just gave me goosebumps. Thank you for sharing.

  2. Beautiful piece about the *Wives* !! True ... we often neglect our soul .... Thanks for sharing. New follower on GFC from MBC... feel free to hop by my blog when you get a chance :)

  3. most of us does that. U r welcome Sunithi.

  4. Posted by Neil Paul @ Linkedin

    "Outstanding and Thank you very much."

  5. Kelly Winters (Sales & Marketing Assistant)@ Linkedin wrote:

    "This is incredibly inspiring and a fantastic reminder about all the internal strength & vision that each of us has!"

  6. This post kept me spellbound... It was awesomeee :) Glad I discovered your blog on indiblogger... Completely agree with you and the story & its moral is sooo inspiring.. Thank you for sharing this...

    I usually won't ask this but cant resist after reading your post. Would love to see your feedback and comments on my blog. Pls drop by when you have time. I blog on life, motivation and inspirations :)


  7. Hello, I was very moved by this post... You have a way with words Sonia and I will have to share the 4 wives story with my husband, he would appreciate it! I'm a new follower, found you on MBC and glad I did!

    Maribel (http://how2mom.blogspot.com

  8. I am a new follower!! Great blog. Please come by my blog/.

  9. thanks a lot Anand, and sure i shall give my feedback on your blog.

  10. welcome TheyInspireMe, i shall take a look at your blog too.

  11. this is a story worth reading and worth sharing... thank you for sharing this.

    i'm your newest follower from MBC. Please visit and follow my blogs...


    thanks again sonia...

  12. Hi Sonia:

    This is WONDERFUL!! I love it!! I am now following you. Could you possibly follow my blog?www.littlelillypolkadotbedtimeblog.blogspot.com. THANK you so very much!!

    Also please see the new interactive kids' website-www.littlelillypolkadot.com!

  13. Nice blog. Will be following it and reading with interest.
    Cheers to Life.

  14. You have an incredible gift for story telling.

    I am your new royal follower from the Mommy Bloggers Club ~~ honored to meet your acquaintance
    Lady Bren HRH(Here Reality's Humorous)

  15. thanks lady bren, u r welcome here.

  16. Hi Sonia,
    Loved the story. Thank you for sharing.
    You have a great blog.

  17. Loved the pictures, and the moral posed with your article.

    I'm following you now from MBC. I'd love for you to follow me back at www.thegleemansbaby.blogspot.com Thanks!

  18. Hi Sonia ...came here hoping to find a new post :) Sheesh...your'e like me ...take time to post...No worries I understand:) Just droppped by to say...took yr advice and changed the font on my blog making it easier on the eye I think, and gave it a new look. When you have some time.... hop by my blog.

  19. yes Sunithi, being little slow in posting.